07 October 2007

a little bard

i spent the weekend in cedar city as a chaperone for the high school. it was Shakespeare competition, and not surprisingly, american fork took an overall first place in its division. i had the opportunity to see the fall show series while i was down there. as a whole group we saw Henry V. an interesting rendition of the show, but it was mainly SUU students. the following day i saw three shows. the mousetrap, the tempest, and art. all were great shows! the tempest isn't my favorite shakespeare play (ironically it was on my reading list from a few weeks ago) but it was a great production. technically speaking, changing between sets for each show is a NIGHTMARE! i can't imagine having to do it everyday. i went and watched the change over from mousetrap to tempest, and all i can say is that i shouldn't have complained so much about having to set up and take down the speaker system for caesar. it takes 1hr 15 minutes to change sets, change light gels, and then run through the lights and sound to make everything has been correctly set for the change over. insane!

it was nice to get away for a few days. almost so nice that i hated the part where i had to come back and do homework. the desire to continue school is a hard one sometimes. i look at my older brother and wonder how it is that he's been able to keep his nose to the grind and continue schooling. but he has a family to support, and so i know there has to be motivation from them to continue in school. i guess i just get frustrated sometimes because in some aspects i feel like some classes are a waist of my time and money. read this book, write this paper, take this test, rinse and repeat, and at the end of the semester forget everything. just so that at the end of the process i can get a piece of paper that says i'm a well rounded individual and more capable of a job because i took some general ed classes. i've adapted a phrase from julianna (who is one year ahead of me in graduating.) in these classes which fill her life only with extra busy work she says "eh, it's good enough." and i don't know whether i should feel good or bad about adapting such a phrase into my attitude towards school. granted, i put a lot of effort into classes and projects i see worth my time and effort. but as for the others, as long as i pass that's all i really care about.

i guess a lot of how i'm feeling stems from this job i have. i don't enjoy it. i get paid really well, but i don't enjoy it. it adds unneeded stress in my life. i know i've asked for more to do to help the speeches part be acceptable, but i don't think anyone in the department talks about which students they have helping out on which projects. in the last week (on top of usual speeches crap and my computer crashing) joyce has asked me to help her with some alumni house updates, jeff has asked me to help with some music selections and other things for an upcoming spread in the magazine (for the web) about musicians on campus and hunting down different bands, artists, etc who go to byu, jed and i have to do another video segment for the psychology video since when we had them OK the video so we could lock it for editing they didn't have a problem with the fact that there were more men being interviewed than women and now they do, chad wants me to create some video commercials from old footage with new titles that i got from dave which are going to look like crap with the old footage and the old raw footage was from a project from charles which no one can seem to find so i'll have to use the compressed video, and hopefully brandon did the color correction for the marriott school so i can give them a final copy to send to the printer for distribution (which they originally were not planning on.), and all of this while staying on top of my classes and only working 20 hrs a week. what a joke! this is a work load for a full time employee. work that would be manageable during the summer when i don't have school. the secretary for publications and graphics wrote me an email saying that apparently a couple of people (probably old people) have called some byu relations office wherever that is saying that they are frustrated because there isn't always someone answering the phone when they try to make an order. well can they see why!? i do my best to stay on top of it all, but i really just want it all to go away. i feel validated that so many people need my help for projects, but it's like they don't realize that i'm also in charge of speeches and need to be around to answer the stupid phone for the old people.

i guess being in cedar city made me yearn to be somewhere else with a whole new set of problems and a whole new set of complaints. working backstage on a show at a professional theater being fully dedicated in a much more concentrated environment rather than having 6 different people expecting me to cram 40 hours of week into 20 hours a week (oh and not to mention i only work tues, thursdays, and fridays.) as much as i enjoy my pay check i'm still not sure it's worth it. i guess i do know that it was the better choice between staying and doing speeches and going to work for byu broadcasting.

time warp, two years from now. life will be better! and i will be in the position (with a degree under my belt) i want to be to go work anywhere i want! for now i just have to keep telling myself to suck it up (and to frequent the job board byu's website just in case something amazing appears)

1 comments:

Michelle said...

okay, first of all, way to post at a normal, 8:04pm or something, time (instead of your usual...must be the new bed was calling)

Second, no longer do I think you have to read that part for the Christmas Carol. You've made your point.

Finally, I think you were very wise in the statment saying you want "to be somewhere else with a whole new set of problems and a whole new set of complaints." Because I DO think that every experience has its share of cons. The key is finding something where thee pros are SO worth it, you can handle a con every once in awhile.

It's a tricky process, one that takes time and patience I think. when you've figured it out, can you let Brandon in on the secret? :)